Maybe We Should Start Judging Books By Their Covers
What my eyes have seen...
I was at a training, yesterday and I sat alone for a while until someone I knew came to sit beside me let's call her SB. Mind you, this was a training filled with many professionals in communications and SB and I are still students.
Shortly after SB arrived, she pointed out a woman seated two rows away and asked me to observe her. I brushed it off, saying I was there to learn, not to analyze people. However, SB soon commented that the woman was being what we’d call "notice me." I defended the woman, suggesting she was simply eager to learn.
Throughout the training, the woman actively asked and answered questions, as well as shared comments. I saw her as someone trying to get her money's worth. But a part of me couldn’t help but recall the "oversabi" girls from school—those who always had to show they knew more than everyone else.
Sometime during the training, we were grouped to carry out a task and guess who SB and I were grouped with? Yes, her and about six others. I took a while packing up before joining the group discussion and by the time I got there, there was an ongoing argument. For a task we only had 10 minutes to cover?
When I tried to offer a suggestion, the woman shot it down. Initially, I thought it was because I was a student, but then a professional faced the same response. SB gave me a knowing look, and I decided to stay quiet.
After a few moments of this woman shutting down everyone's idea because 'she knew best', everyone else pretty much left her alone to come up with all the ideas. When she was done, the team nominated her to present the idea to the entire class but she refused. Why shut everyone else down if you were not going to follow through till the end?
Eventually, it was time to start presenting and guess what? She walked out of the classroom. We let other groups go ahead hoping to have her return before they were done and she did return. Only that when our group was called, she sat in her seat with an air of arrogance refusing to step forward. I wonder what she was thinking.
In the end, the group nominated me as the representative. Nervous but determined, I presented the very idea she had rejected. To my surprise, I did well—so well that a few attendees approached me afterward for my contact.
Reflecting on the experience, I realized how quickly my perspective of the woman shifted. I went from defending her eagerness to giving her the stink eye. I had hoped to leave such behavior behind with university, but clearly, the corporate world is not immune to it.
From now on, I'd not judge people who judge books by their covers because sometimes the covers do reflect the content of the book.